Bears are a threat. And not just to humans–to equids. Specifically, donkeys.

If you aren’t familiar with The Colbert Report, host Honorable Professor Dr. Stephen T. Colbert, DFA, reviews the Top 5 threats to America during the Threat Down portion of his Comedy Central news broadcast. Along with zombies, robots, and icebergs, Colbert frequently cites bears as a top threat to the nation.

Read more about Colbert’s stance on bears, from Wikiality, The Truthiness Encyclopedia (potentially NFSW). And did you know you can generate your own Threat Down? Delightful.

So where do the donkeys come in?

In Canada, that’s where.

According to an article in the Salmon Arm Observer, a small black bear is the leading suspect in the death of an area donkey, although the case details read like a script from CSI.

A bear was reported in the area. Bear tracks and scat were found in the donkey’s pen. But the donkey’s wounds were inconsistent with a bear’s normal feeding habits.

"Why it’s kind of confusing me is bears will consume large amounts of meat at one time, and the pictures show very little had been taken," Conservation Officer Michael Richardson said. "So it’s a mystery