A Polish man is in trouble. The story involves a horse or horses, one of which was found hitched the front axle of his van. Beyond that, the details depend on whom you ask.

The Daily Mail version goes like this: 55-year-old lumberjack Leszek Stepien (who might have had a nip of vodka–an officer said he was at twice the legal limit), loaded a stallion and a mare into the back of his son’s van to take them home. At some point during the journey, the stallion got loose and attempted to mount the mare. She objected.

In the confusion, Stepien hit a roadside barrier and tipped the van. He then hitched the stallion to the front of the vehicle and was attempting to right the vehicle when firefighters arrived.

In the Horse and Hound version, the van broke down and Stepien (now a farmer and 7 years older) attempted to use the stallion to tow it to a garage. However, he steered the horse into the path of an oncoming vehicle, which tipped the van.

Horse and Hound reported, “When police arrived, an undeterred Stepien was standing in the road berating his horse for causing the accident, yelling, ‘This is all your fault.’ &